“I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be.”
--- Douglas Adams

Monday, August 31, 2015

Setting Myself Up

(see note at bottom)

I started online dating. Eh, that's not totally correct. I haven't actually started online dating. I signed up on a dating site. I haven't dated anyone or met anyone in person or spoken to anyone. I didn't quite know what to expect, and I still don't, but I find the whole enterprise really odd. You fill out a profile for yourself of what you look like and what you like to do and if you have kids and if you like pina coladas, then you answer  questions about what you're looking for in a mate. Do you just want a booty call? Do you want to get married upon meeting? Do you want to chat constantly for 2 days and then stop communicating abruptly? What's your religion? Do you only side-hug like Duggars or will you try to round third on the 1st date? What are your feelings towards 420? What's your "shoe size"? Do you speak any other languages? Greek, perhaps?

It's odd. It's hard to interpret someone's tone of voice or inflection in type. I wish there was a standardized way to do that in type since that's how people communicate these days. You'd think the written language would evolve to include punctuation to indicate intention; sarcasm, sadness, regret, pride, humor, love, etc. Maybe emoticons serve that purpose. I'd rather see it reflected in punctuation rather than symbols, but that's just me.

Anyhow

I have to tell you, I'd rather meet someone naturally, or be set up with by a friend. Being set up by a friend seems to be like a good option because I know my friend will grill any guy to a stub of nothing to make sure he's a good catch for me. At least if the friend does the set up, he's already been through the toughest part of the initiation. By being set up, I can be sure he passes their tests.

 I'm not looking for a husband. I'm not looking for a booty call. I'm not even looking for something really serious.
So what am I looking to get out of this experience? Hmmmm. You know what I want? Someone who is more than a friend who I can be me around; someone I look forward to seeing and get all giddy when a text from him comes through, someone I get along with and enjoy being around but referred to mostly as "this guy I'm seeing."  Maybe there are dates here and there with other people, but "this guy I'm seeing" stays in the picture.  "This guy I'm seeing" is a good guy. I just want to take my time in finding out if he's the right guy. Think I'll find him?

That said, I have chatted through the dating site to a few people. There have been a few creepers but those conversations are quickly ignored and go away soon enough. There have been a few who decide it's not to be and communication stops. We'll see how this all turns out. I'll probably pee my pants a little if anyone actually suggests we meet in person.

(note at the bottom)
I wrote this piece a few weeks ago. Look for an update soon.

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